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i had the most wonderful and frightening and beautiful and mysterious experience.
walking through the arboretum, a light mist falling and a chill in the wet, my hands were getting cold but i laughed at passers-by with their umbrellas. why miss being embraced by autumn's first breaths?
the trees were lovely green with pink berry-drops (the European Spindle Tree) and then i heard it: a soft cooing like a bird. i followed the sound for a little while before i realized it was someone whistling. but unlike any whistling i'd heard before-- a bird-like quality with soaring melody, more like singing than anything else. and it just kept going and going, a haunting song that i felt like i'd heard somewhere before.
the guy was walking around by himself, backpack and headphones on-- i stood still and watched him as he walked amongst the trees and flowers. That music! it was so beautiful! I had to follow him and keep listening. I walked around the arboretum, just letting the melody thrill my ears. captivating. i felt like a child of hamlin, being lured by the pied piper. I must have stayed there listening for half and hour. the only thing that got me to leave was the thought that gabriel was waiting for me to skype him. the whistling was ringing in my ears the whole way home...
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| haha, well we just got back from quite an interesting weekend.
beginning on thursday with claire gabriel and me driving down to n. c. it was SUCH a long drive, i mean like leaving at 10:30 and not getting in until 1am. yah.
the drive down was rough because there was lots of construction, and taking 75 to lexington rather than cutting through KY, and in VA the speed limit is only 65 you know, and we stopped several times for directions, gas, leg-stretches and driver-switches. and food. Penny's Diner was a cool place because the outside looked like an alien spacecraft, shiny silver 50's dome and inside we had a buffalo burger and sat at the counter and got a milkshake and cake to go. mm.
the first night we just kind of collapsed in exhaustion. went over to the beach the next morning just for a 'walk' which ended up being frisbee. but i don't really like frisbee cause i fail at it. mine were going all over the place and i was standing in the water cause i had the shortest shorts. but the tide was coming in i think so then i got wet by this huge wave, so i changed places with gabriel and then again with lauryn. is this too much detail? annnyways. gabriel got drenched, haha.
then i was tired so cl he and i took a walk on the beach. =) and then went back, changed, ate leftover bolivian for lunch and came back out in suits, swam, frolicked in the waves. watched Coraline, freaky dolls with button eyes. made dinner-- pasta with mushrooms, zuchini and dad made salmon on the grill. i feel like this is boring :X
anyways. we went on a walk on the beach at night and that was pretty fun. we went far, and gabriel and i held hands :) except i was a little worried we were isolating claire and gramps that way// oh well.
yeah so gabriel cl and i were sharing a room. it wasn't that awkward the three of us sharing a room. or at least, i didn't think so. but for the two of them maybe moreso? considering they're not eachother's bf or sister. ;)
lessee... the next day, we went to the beach again. did some swimming, maybe. the cool part (which i really have been wanting to write about, and i'm annoyed by everything written up to this point) was when gabriel dug a huge pit. i helped by building a wall around it with the sand. i'm pretty good at building walls apparently. the best part of the day was me and gabriel just sitting in that pit, waiting for the tide to come in.
but then cl was being whiny so she kicked in some of the wall to speed up the process. that didn't work fast enough so i just got out and went swimming with her. when we came back, gabriel was burried to his armpits in sand. haha. i wasn't worried because he's good at holding his breath but bett and dad felt that, were a wave to take him by surprise, he might swallow sea water and drown.
digging him out was a lot harder than it looked. he was only sitting up, crossed-legged, but the sand was all packed around his body, and whenever a wave came it refilled everything with (quick) sand. so that was a little scary thinking i could have left him in there.. but oh well, it was also fun when all the water came rushing in over the wall. haha. =)
then! we ate some pb&j sandwiches on the beach. that's not what i meant.
THEN! we went HANGGLIDING!!! it was so coool XD
a long walk across some dunes, past some vernal pools, and up a hill of sand... just listen to the instructions-- bar under chin! ok, now walk..jog..run... look at the cow! head up! relax! wiggle your fingers! flare! start running in air! flare! *smash.* somehow you've landed on your feet after an exhilarating 49 seconds flying through the air. so cool.
pics!
 
well. that's kinda all i wanted to write about. also we did a puzzle of hot air balloons that had twenty-some pieces missing, annoyingly. annd... we made dinner again. shrimp and spaghetti, and Kris was so nice and friendly as he gabriel cl and i made the salad together. :)
Claire would wander off sometimes to journal or listen to music by herself. we found her right before bed up on the 'crow's nest', which gabriel didn't find as scary as i'd expected. stargazed in the lovely sky.
also on the way back, we drove through raleigh and i was filled with an unaccountable fondness for the city. i guess because i finally recognized some roads? and saw 'chapel hill' everywhere. it was.. a good refresher.
haha! and gabriel got pulled over by a cop! for speeding down the AA hwy 9, KY! i felt more self-justified for having scolded him.
oh. that's another thing. he said durring the trip, when all of us were talking about faults or something... no wait. i was talking about why i didn't like Kalla. and then he was like.. Kim, you're pretty critical yourself.
i was like.. so floored when he said that. i know sometimes i correct him on stuff.. and that he's easily hurt when i do that so i have to try not to be too brisk about it.. but i didn't realize that he thought of me as critical. it really made me scared about how little i know about myself.. it is by our selves that we are most often deceived?
so yeah. i am vowing to be less critical about things that aren't important. and if he asks me what i think about something or other he's doing, i'll be sure to give him extra praise for the stuff he's doing right. sigh. i didn't realize i was such a mean person! I'd always wondered why so many people seem to not like me. maybe this is part of the reason? i've also been accused of being jugemental before, haha. that kindof connects...
picking gracia up from the airport. was such a rewarding experience. because i guess, i've been hanging with gabriel so much, that i was in this mode of thinking of him as a boyfriend. it's a little different when claire or my dad is around too, or at church or something, but not that much. i see him as 'my boyfriend when there are other people around'. But with gracia... such a different story.
and actually, if you go back to when we first were getting to know eachother, part of why i liked him was because of his easy manner with gracia, and the obvious affection they had for one another, despite harsh words. just so brotherly! cl and i melt for brotherly love <3.
[side note. i'm not really a harsh words kind of person. but now it makes more sense to me why she sukh and jing all trade insults like.. constantly. it's some form of expressing love]
aww. gabriel was so happy/excited to see gracia. i could tell not only by the way he jumped up and gave her a hug, not only by the way he was asking her a ton of questions and focusing on her entirely (which really, dear, i didn't mind), but by the way he was so freaked out about getting there on time in order to get her from the airport. and that he was driving like 80mph for a couple hours to make up for lost time. gabriel gabriel. of course, that's the part that gracia doesn't get to see. wish i could tell her, prove to her that gabriel really loves her a lot, and that it has nothing to do with science olimpiad... haha oh well. their relationship remains a complete mystery to me. this is only one day's glimpse into something i can only feel privileged to look in on. :) | | |
| Miya is a year older than me, i guess just because of how school years work out in china/moving to america. i think she's a lot more mature than i am. well i mean, going off to another country for college. i couldn't do that, wow. though i guess that boarding school for jr high helped. she cooks, does laundry, etc just like a young woman. she wears her hair in a bun and has her own sense of style.
so, she is always trying to get me to act more mature. she thinks i'm too much of a teenager? still wearing hoodies and leaving my hair without brushing it and dating mcg. still very tied to my family and not a lot of sense when it comes to packing :P
when we were shopping for clothes, she told me about a friend of hers. she grew up without a father for some reason, i think he was abusive and the mom left him? or something. so she grew up just her and her mom. they had to be very strong for each other. when this girl turned 18, her mother bought her a pair of high heels. "your first heels" she said. "because now you are a woman." this girl, miya explained, is more grown-up than some of her peers at school. she is a little quieter, always dresses with class. this black dress that i bought, miya says, is like something that friend of hers would wear. not a hoodie-dress with a sheep. no matter how cute that sheep may be.
she wrote this to me afterward as well:
and dear kim, if u ever miss me ( haha) or anything about china, stand/sit upright then. be more confident! don't forget how " our ppl" from the tour group want to be in the same picture with u, the sales girls in that drug store, the two boys with the much too obvious movement when we were on a walk to the supermarket in Beijing..... this is her way of telling me that i'm beautiful with an inner beauty and that i can be a confident young woman
of all the things i learned in china, this was the most important.
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| I had the best dream ever last night. I almost wish it had a deeper meaning because it was so beautiful.
Me, and Claire. Best friends. I'm not sure where we were? sometimes it seemed like my grandma's garage or inside some kind of mobile home. Part of it also seemed to be at college. It was all one setting in the dream, of course. Dreams are like that.
And there was this precious little girl, maybe six years old? brown hair that was a bit reddish, and a face that shone like the sun, so full of joy. She was little enough that i could lift her up, no problem. She loved being hugged.
I'm not sure why, but this girl was staying with us because there was something wrong. I want to say she had cancer? but also she didn't have much of a family. You know how really young kids, sometimes, even if they've had a not-so-good past, are just so happy and trusting when they get to know you, they aren't bitter at the world. Was it cancer? I'm pretty sure she was dying. I'm not sure that she knew it. But Claire and I knew that we only had this one summer with her.
Me, Claire, and this little angel. Wish i could remember her name. We played with her and read with her and rough housed a little. She became tired pretty easily, so we had to be careful and let her rest some. I remember looking at her as she was sleeping. Her face still a bit pudgy, so peaceful as she dreamed.
Claire and I were talking and she came running up to us and I reached out and gave her a hug and Claire gave her a hug from her side and it was this overwhelming happiness of giving love to someone who needs it. And into her hair, tight within a group hug, I whispered, 'sisters.' and we were.
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i don't know what erin really expects.. i'm an out-of-stater.. i don't really care about basketball.. Yes, it was fun to rush franklin once. i'll go again if we win the championship.. but i told her beforehand i wouldn't want to go..
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